Believe yourself

Sep 25, 2013 /

I suppose it was Yoshi who did this to me first.

I learned that it is called "moral harassment, apparently. Well, at least my cases fit the examples quite a bit. Anyway, 10 years of being harassed is enough to remove every single confidence and self-esteem from me.

What happens when you are in that kind of situation? You would always worry the harasser's feeling not to make him/her mad. You would always, always put him/her first and then you would come to be unsure what you really want to do, what you really like, and you would lose your own sense of right and wrong. More simply, you would be a complete kiss-ass.

Interestingly, some people around me gradually changed their attitude once I was "too nice" to them. Apparently they began looking down on me. No I am not just being paranoid. While there are many who appreciate my consideration, there actually are some people who try to exploit me. That means once you become weak you will be a prey. What is worse, they don't realize they are exploiting. They believe that they have the right to exploit because they are way more excellent than you.

 

After all, I bitterly learned. There are tons and tons of people in this world who are harsh like Yoshi and senseless like them. You can't avoid all of them in your whole life. The important things are to learn how to defend, deny, insist. It doesn't matter if you are right or wrong. Just be strong as yourself. Believe yourself no matter what. 

I will not be a prey of those inconsiderate people anymonre, so I determined. 

Of course, I won't forget being considerate and paying regard.

 

...Oh, I must say this! Yoshi has changed. I don't know why but he is much less harsh to me now. Maybe I have met his standard, or maybe he has learned to be thoughtful. Maybe both. We have learned about each other. 10 years of marriage mean a lot.

I don't want to give up on every relationship for moral harassment.