Eigobin Special 1

 

GetUpEnglishでは、ネイティブ添削の「英語便」（http://www.eigobin.com/）のすぐれたサービスを何度も紹介してきましたが、今も変わらず和文英訳や作家のインタビュー記事のチェックなどで大いにお世話になっております。

　GetUpEnglishでは、今日11月14日（月）18日（金）の5日間、英語便のサービスをご紹介したいと思います。

　19日（土）にはプレゼントのお知らせもあります。どうかそちらもご期待ください。

  では、「英語便」特集第１日目の今日は、「英米作家へのインタビュー記事」の例をご紹介します。

　わたしは2007年にトム・コーウィン『ぼくのだいじなボブ』(Tom Corwin, Mostly Bob)本を翻訳出版しました。

　http://bookclub.kodansha.co.jp/product?isbn=9784062138000

その際に、著者トム・コーウィンにインタビューしたのですが、それは日本語で発表しただけですので、英語の細部にそれほどこだわる必要はありませんでした。

しかし、ほぼ十年ぶりに当時のインタビューを振り返ってみて、英文でもしっかりした形で残したいと思いました。また、トム・コーウィンはミュージシャンでもあり、Mostly BobというBob Dylanのトリビュート・アルバムを制作した人でもあります。ディランがノーベル文学賞を受賞したので、このインタビューはタイムリーだと思います。

そんなことがあり、英語便にこのインタビュー記事にあるわたしの英語の質問部分をこのたびチェックしてもらいました。英語の使い方はもちろん、interviewerのあり方も教えてくれる非常にありがたい添削が戻され、大変感激しております。

本日のGetUpEnglishでは、英語便が添削してくれた上杉のAn Interview with Tom Corwinをご紹介します。（英語便の許可を得て、添削記事をそのまま転載します）

　http://mostlydylan.com/

01.Tom Corwin , Producer of Mostly Dylan
02. Interviewed by Hayato Uesugi, Editor/Translator
03.
04.AN INTERVIEW WITH TOM CORWIN
05.
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07.Q1: First, would you tell us about the making of MOSTLY DYLAN?
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10.Q2: What about the musicians joining who participated in MOSTLY DYLAN: George Marinelli, Rickie Fataar, and others musicians ―Michael Rodriguez, Randy Quan, Jimmy Sanchez, Jerry Cortez, Peter Booras, Garrin Benfeild? Their playing in performances on the CD are amazing. Needless to say, the performances of Tim Hockenberry and Bonnie Raitt and yourself here could not have been greater, too better, either . Could you briefly introduce them and their playing abilities ?
11.
12.Q3: MOSTLY DYLAN is a tribute album to Bob Dylan, with a new perspective on his songs , by you and Tim Hockenberry. It is the of Dylan by the two of you. Ten songs of that on the album are Dylan’s, but you include two of your own original songs, “Two Steps Back” and “Flirting With Disaster”. The two songs seem to be like songs Dylanesque wrote , but they have genuine originality, too. They are magnetic!
13.How did you manage decide to put the two songs into onto this CD? Your choice made for a great result, but I’m wondering whether you wrestled with that choice.
14.
15.Q4: What does Bob Dylan and his music mean to you? What is it in Dylan that has intrigued you? His music attracts people from all over the world. In addition, his lyrics make us think a lot. Some people have recently said he should get the Nobel Prize for Literature for his lyrics. Are you intrigued by his lyrics as well as his music?
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17.Q5: You launched your label MOSTLY with this CD. And this MOSTLY DYLAN is the first in a series of editions that will feature new perspectives on legendary artists. Do you have concrete future plans now?
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20.Q6: The jacket cover of MOSTLY DYLAN is really nice . Who designed it?
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23.Q7: After many years of recording and performing as a bass player and vocalist with a variety of artists including Patti LaBelle, Booker T., Bonnie Raitt and the House of Blues band, you chose to focus your attention on producing and recording. Can you tell us about your activities as a musician in those days and as a producer now?
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25.Q8: What about your own music background. Where did you learn how to play music and ?
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28.Q9: Do you have some any favorite musician or musicians?
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30.Q10: I heard you have had some experiences of playing here in Japan. You played at Tokyo Blue Note as a member of the Booker T. band in 1998. Please tell us about the shows and your impression of Japanese audiences.
31.
32.Q11: You published MOSTLY BOB just after MOSTLY DYLAN had been completed. Bob was still alive while you were making MOSTLY DYLAN and I am quite sure Bob enjoyed listening to the sound you guys were making. Can you tell us something about Bob?
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オレンジ:スペルミス/紫:変更されたワード/赤:付加された必要ワード/緑:不必要なワード/青:意味が解りづらいもの/不自然な言い回し/青緑 : Impressive!(自然/クリエイティブな表現)

先生からのコメント

01. The comma should be positioned directly after the previous word. A space should then be left before the start of the following word.
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10. Use 'who' as the conjunction between clauses when the second clause refers to a person or people introduced in the first clause. "He is the man who spoke to John."
The verb 'join' refers only to the moment when a person decides to 'join' the group. Thereafter, that person is a member of the group, or a participant in the activity the group has been set up for. In this case, it's better to use the verb 'participate.'
It's not necessary to use 'musicians' again here. It's already understood from information given earlier that musicians are being referred to. It would be far more natural to a native speaker to just say 'others' here.
While we understand that these musicians are playing on the CD, when we look back on what they did, we generally talk in terms of their overall 'performance.'
The preposition 'on' is used with music or songs 'on' a CD.
The plural of 'be' is needed to agree with multiple people.
Nice use of 'needless to say' here. The phrase "it goes without saying" could also have been used.
The comparative 'better' is needed here.
Use 'either' at the end of the sentence where an agreeing thought is being expressed (I don't like tennis and I don't like golf, either).
Perhaps it's better to use 'abilities' when referring to what they can do.
11.
12. Too many unnecessary words are being used in the second comment. It would be more natural to add the 'new perspective on' phrase to the first comment. The same point is now made, using far fewer words than in the original. Structuring a comment or question in such a way is important in an interview situation, as there's nothing worse than an interviewer who speaks too much.
Use the preposition 'on' again here, along with 'the' to refer to the album. We can use 'this' or 'the' to refer to the album under discussion, but the sudden use of 'that' would suggest there is a different album being mentioned as well.
Using the one word 'Dylanesque' which means 'in the manner of Dylan' would be a great way to make the point while using far fewer words.
13. The interviewer is referring to a 'decision' here; they decided to do this.
Songs are recorded 'onto' CD.
Great comment. Excellent use of 'wrestle with' here.
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15. Dylan is one person and the music belongs to him, so use the 3rd person singular here (what does).
Good question with good use of 'intrigue.'
Add the preposition 'from' before 'all over the world.'
The key point is that these comments were made 'recently' so this adverb should be placed just before the verb 'said' in the sentence.
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17. 'Of editions' is not needed here. 'The first in a series' is enough detail.
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20. While we understand the meaning of 'jacket' in this sense, the common name is 'cover.' A CD has a cover.
'Really nice' is a little simplistic in tone. We might instead comment on its originality or unique artwork or something else more specifically related to the cover.
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23. Nice comments here. Good information and a good build-up to the question that comes next.
The common phrase is 'in those days.' 'At that time' could also be used.
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25. Again, making this into one question would be the natural method here.
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28. We need to use 'any' in a question. Use 'some' in a plural statement (I have some books) or when using an uncountable noun (I have some beer).
We would almost certainly never separate the singular from the plural here. By using 'musicians' it would automatically be understood that this refers to all musicians, whether solo artists or groups.
29.
30. These experiences are countable, so the plural is needed, along with 'some' (as mentioned above in line 28).
People have experience 'of' doing something. The preposition 'of' is needed.
This would be one single overall impression, so use the singular form here.
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Hello, and thank you for this composition. You have written really well and used some great phrasings and expressions.
Best wishes.
Andrew.

  そして、この英語便の記事を修正した完全版インタビューを、以下に掲載します。

  http://blog.goo.ne.jp/getupenglish/e/4105f21569d7b8d72499e079aebec7af

AN INTERVIEW WITH TOM CORWIN

Tom Corwin, Producer of Mostly Dylan

Interviewed by Hayato Uesugi, Editor/Translator

AN INTERVIEW WITH TOM CORWIN

Q1: First, would you tell us about the making of MOSTLY DYLAN?

Mostly Dylan was conceived as a way of looking at Bob Dylan’s material from a new angle. I was compelled by the idea of approaching his music from a deeply musical perspective with fresh arrangements, great players and a masterful singer. 

Tim Hockenberry and I had worked together before, he is truly a singer’s singer and really knows how to get inside a song.  Tim and I worked together to pick songs that we felt we could dig into.  Next we explored where the musical heart of those songs were from a fresh perspective.

The challenge was to remain true to the melody and chord changes of the songs while doing our best not to be influenced by past recordings and arrangements.

With each song, I tried to clear my mind and listen from my own intuition for the music that told the story. Some songs changed dramatically in tempo and feel from the originals, but the dedication was always to honor the song and lyrics in the process.

Q2: What about the musicians who participated in MOSTLY DYLAN: George Marinelli, Rickie Fataar, and others ― Michael Rodriguez, Randy Quan, Jimmy Sanchez, Jerry Cortez, Peter Booras, Garrin Benfeild? Their performances on the CD are amazing. Needless to say, the performances of Tim Hockenberry and Bonnie Raitt and yourself here could not have been better, either . Could you briefly introduce them and their abilities ?

That constitutes a lot of deserving introductions. All these players were very specific choices for what they could bring to the recordings.

George Marinelli is one the most musical and melodic guitar players I know. He has played with Bonnie Raitt in her touring band for over a decade. He brought amazing ears, tone and sensitivity to the studio.

Ricky Fataar has the deepest and most solid pocket of any drummer I can think of. He is also a great listener, and plays from a music first perspective. Ricky has also been in Bonnie’s touring band for ove r a decade.

Jimmy Sanchez is a great drummer, his slinky feel on Rainy Day Woman still knocks me out. I don’t know anyone else who can play like him.

I have played with Randy Quan a lot over the years. He is one of those rare guitar players who listens for when not to play as an equally valid musical choice. We played together with Booker T at the Tokyo Blue Note. I love his solo on Rainy Day Woman and his playing on Times are a Changin’.

Jerry Cortez, has played with a lot of people including Jesse Colin Young. He brings a great feel to the acoustic guitar and supported the two originals on the record.

Michael Rodriguez is a wonderful engineer, our ears worked really well together in crafting the sound of the record. He also brought enormous sensitivity and care the recording process.

Whereas the basic tracks for all the Dylan Material were recorded in a top  studio, Two Steps Back and Flirting with Disaster were both recorded in my living room, which was not designed for sound, but has a wonderful feeling in it. These sessions were less formal, Peter Booras and Chris Sandoval were the drummers on these sessions and they both did such a good job that I decided not to re-record them. 

Q3: MOSTLY DYLAN is a tribute album to Bob Dylan, with a new perspective on his songs , by you and Tim Hockenberry. Ten songs on the album are Dylan’s, but you include two of your own original songs, “Two Steps Back” and “Flirting With Disaster”. The two songs seem Dylanesque, but they have genuine originality, too. They are magnetic!

How did you decide to put the two songs onto this CD? Your choice made for a great result, but I’m wondering whether you wrestled with that choice.

I was very concerned about the presumptuousness of including my original songs next to Bob Dylan’s genius. I really went back and forth on the decision to include these songs. I finally decided NOT to include the originals on the record and mastered the record without them.

Then Carol Yumkas, my manager at the time, who loved these songs, insisted I go back and put the originals back on.  At her encouragement I re-mastered the record including the two originals. Surprisingly they did seem to fit musically and sonically in the final master. Since the CD came out I have gotten a lot of positive feedback about these songs. So I’m glad it seems to have worked. Carol really gets credit in the end for their inclusion.

Q4:What does Bob Dylan and his music mean to you? What is it in Dylan that has intrigued you? His music attracts people from all over the world. In addition, his lyrics make us think a lot. Some people have recently said he should get the Nobel Prize for Literature for his lyrics. Are you intrigued by his lyrics as well as his music?

I am compelled by Bob Dylan as a powerful cultural force and as an extraordinary poet. There is no denying that he had an amazing impact on a generation. It is equally stunning that his influence continues to be felt by succeeding generations.

I think his greatest strength is in his poetry and conviction. His melodies are also penetrating.  His approach to music production was always elementary, which worked because it emphasized its rawness, consequently I felt there was an opportunity to honor his genius from a respectful, yet more sophisticated musical perspective.

Q5: You launched your label MOSTLY with this CD. And this MOSTLY DYLAN is the first in a series that will feature new perspectives on legendary artists. Do you have concrete future plans now?

Absolutely, the concept of MOSTLY is to continue to find opportunities to explore other iconic music from new perspectives. I have been sidetracked by other projects  in the last year, but I am excited to continue the series.

Q6:The cover of MOSTLY DYLAN is cool. Who designed it?

I designed the CD package, but the cover photo was taken by a wonderful photographer named Christine Alicino. Tim Hockenberry’s wife is a photographers rep and she represents Christine. Tim sent me this photo among others as options for the cover. This one really jumped out at both of us as a perfect match for the feel of the record.   Christine also provided the interior photos, which again really felt right.

Q7: After many years of recording and performing as a bass player and vocalist with a variety of artists including Patti LaBelle, Booker T., Bonnie Raitt and the House of Blues band, you chose to focus your attention on producing and recording. Can you tell us about your activities as a musician in those days and as a producer now?

I’ve worked most of my life as a backup musician. And have been lucky enough to work with some great players along the way.  Several years ago I started to focus more on studio work, having tired of the travel and labor of playing live. It is always fun to play, but when you’re on the road you may travel two days to play one hour.

About this time I met Bonnie and we began to work together on different projects. We have become great friends and I have had the pleasure of performing with her and working on about twenty different records with her in the studio. 

I love the creative process of getting into a song, finding the best way to express it musically and nurturing the best performances.  This is the thrill of working in the studio.  

Q8:What about your own music background. Where did you learn how to play music?

I am essentially self-taught. I had the good fortune of discovering the thrill of playing music when I was about thirteen. I listened to records and found I could quickly figure out how to play what I heard. I loved soul music, Motown, blues and jazz, which became a real focus. I developed my chops by learning all the bass parts on my favorite records.

I started playing professionally in clubs when I was fourteen. I am still not sure how I got away with this because I looked my age, but I played in bars with bands that were in their twenties and somehow the management never raised the issue of my being underage.

I also played jazz with some incredibly talented young players. Adam Nussbaum, Robert Aries and I formed a jazz trio and continued to play together from age fourteen to nineteen.

As you may know, Adam turned out to be one of the great Jazz drummers of our time and the keyboard player Rob Aries grew up to tour with John Scofield in his funk band . Adam is still touring the world. Rob has settled down and is focused on raising his daughter, but still plays some great gigs.

Q9:Do you have any favorite musicians?

There are so many musicians I love. They range from soul to pop to jazz to classical, really too many to list. It is always hard to single them out, but Aretha Franklin, Miles Davis, The Beatles, Bach, Jaco Pastorius, Jonatha Brooke. Portishead, Michael Brecker, Radiohead, Me'shell NdegéOcello, Ella Fitzgerald, Beck, Peter Gabriel, Ennio Morricone,are a few, the list goes on and on.

Q10:I heard you have had some experiences of playing here in Japan. You played at Tokyo Blue Note as a member of the Booker T. band in 1998. Please tell us about the shows and your impression of Japanese audiences.

I have a special affinity for Japan. Somehow I feel at home there, as if I had lived there in a previous life. I loved playing at the Tokyo Blue Note.  Japanese audiences are really wonderful. They seem to really listen intently and have a deep appreciation of music and musicians that is refreshing.

In America audiences are not always as considerate or attentive. Japanese audiences tend to have a deep and serious love of the music they go out to hear. It is a real treat as a musician to play for such genuinely appreciative audiences.

Q11:  You published MOSTLY BOB just after MOSTLY DYLAN had been completed.  Bob was still alive while you were making MOSTLY DYLAN and I am quite sure Bob enjoyed listening to the sound you guys were making.  Can you tell us something about Bob?

Anyone who has read MOSTLY BOB knows that once Bob penetrated my heart, he was almost always at my side. He lay on the floor underneath my recording console for hundreds of hours during the production of MOSTLY DYLAN. Just picture him at my feet under the console, sleeping with his head right next to my tapping foot.

I really hope you bring the live music of MOSTLY DYLAN to Japan and we can enjoy your shows in the near future!

I would love to bring MOSTLY DYLAN to Japan. We put together a wonderful live band to support the record. There is a magic to the live band that really honors the sensitivity of the record and often spontaneously lifts it up another level. I know Japanese audiences would love the live show.

Copyright © 2007 by Hayato Uesugi